[rescue] 100 Things To Do With That Old Sun

[Gary Nichols]

Ah, but I must contribute to this thread.

My fiance worked out of my home office (ok, it's a kit room) for a few 
months before she landed her new job.  In said kit room are an Ultra 30 
and two SS/5 machines (and other architectures that are irrelevant at 
this point).  Located a few feet away from the kit room is my throne 
room (errr ok it's a bathroom).  

One day I was bored out of my skull at work and decided to ssh home to 
check uptimes, backups, etc.  Evil thoughts crept into my head... EVIL 
thoughts.  A quick scan of the Ultra 30 produced some .au files that 
were interesting.  One caught my eye.. yes.... oh yes... the toilet 
flush .au file.   One by one my Sun children had the toiletflush sound 
file piped into their /dev/audio.... but this was taking too many key 
strokes.  
A script must be written.  
There, now my friend cron will do it for me.
Minutes later my office phone rings.  The conversation went something 
like this:

Me: "Hello?"
Her: "Ummm hi honey.  For some reason the toilet is flushing by itself 
ever few minutes!"
Me: "Really... interesting.  Are you sure it's not stuck? *snicker*"
Her: "No, it's not stuck!  I checked."
Me: "hmmm ok, are the dogs sneaking into the bathroom?"
Her: "I don't think so.  Can they flush the toilet?"
Me: "They are pretty smart dear."
Her: "Wait!  I just heard it again!  And the dogs are outside!"
Me: "OMG!  That's weird!  What do you think we should do?"
Her: "I don't know!  That's why I'm calling you!"
(I start cat'ing other sounds into the machines)
Her: "Wait... I hear cowbells!"
Me: "Honey did you take that migraine medicine again?"
Her: "No!  I swear I hear cowbells!!!"
Me: "Alright... go laydown and take a nap.  You're working too hard."
Her: "I'M NOT WORKING TOO HARD!  SOMETHING IS MAKING A DAMN COWBELL 
SOUND!"
(I change the .au file)
Her: "NOW IT'S A GOD DAMN SLIDE WHISTLE!  ARE YOU DOING SOMETHING?"
(*hysterical laughter at this point*)

It took me 10 seconds to explain to her what I did and 10 days to beg 
forgiveness.


>  Picture this:
> 
>     Tired Digex sysadmins at 3am, in 1995 or so.
>     A few hundred SS2s in racks in the computer room.
>     Running kernels built with /de     Kerberized rsh.
>     An .au file of "Darth Vader's Theme"...
> 
>  What a night!
> 
>     -Dave