Speed, speed, and more speed WAS RE: Motorcycling WAS St. Pete (was RE: [rescue] Sun Ray Thoughts?)

[Amy]

seeing as how lately this list has transgressed into everything
gratuitous, pointless, and inane i thought i'd add in my five cents.

bike: bout 18mph on a heavily unmodified huffy peddling my little 8 year
old legs off to try and get away from matt lewis (token neighborhood
bully). it was a very comfortable ride and it even had a bell and a
sparkly flag too!

scooter: 10mph, leaking gas from the carbureator, 125cc yamaha rivaz. held
together by duct tape and fishing line (literally). i think the post-it
notes detailing what part went where that i accidentally left on produced
too much drag.

car: clocked, stopped, and ticketed going 91mph on a 22% mountain grade.
boy did my ass pucker when i got the 225$ fine! the vehicle itself was
a piece of shit black dodge neon that was criminally underpowered by
drunk white mice. it weighed about a buck-oh-five loaded.

car that i owned: around 70 continuously from austin to chattanooga in my
little red convertible. i see no reason to prove that i have no penis by
burning out an engine before its time.

on public roads: the world doesnt need any more redundancy, does it?

boat: does the rubber ducky in the bathtub count? maybe 1/2mph. and man,
that duck's mass-produced plastic shell was hot, lemme tell ya...

sailing: 6" lego boat, sail made out of a paper towel, stiff west wind,
approximately 2mph.

flying: well, i guess when i was 5 and thought i could do an impersonation
of icarus qualifies... i took a flying leap from the back porch and
managed to reach 30mph or so before i busted my ass on the concrete pad
below.

being flown: dont be silly. i'm not a plane.

falling: refer to "flying", see above.


so.. do i win? DO I GET A COOKIE? I KNOW YER ALL IMPRESSED! BOW DOWN
BEFORE ME!  err, no, dont actually...

--a


On Wed, 14 Nov 2001, Chris Byrne wrote:
> Flying: Mach .8 in a Gulfstream V
<snip of pointless drivel>