[geeks] Things you Cant Do In The Army

[wa2egp at att.net]

> OK, I'll bite ....  what CAN you do with a table full of holes, a thin
> piece of tubing, a plastic container, a pinch clamp and a tiny piece of
> Alka-Seltzer?

The perfect scam!

When I worked in a factory as an "electronic tech", there was this "kid" who 
thought he knew everything.  Prime victim.  Container filled with water, 
tubing to act like a syphon going under the table and up through one of the 
holes. The table was wooded and the holes were created by previous idiots who 
tried to use the table as a drill press.  The pinch clamp is used as the 
on-off switch.  

The hook:  "Did you hear about this new product called freeze dried water?
It was pulled off the market because it was unstable and might explode if
handled improperly."  (As told to one of my accomplices..loudly)

Victim: "There's no such thing!"

"OK, I'll bring some in.  I managed to get some before it was recalled."

Next day:  Apparatus in place.  Take victim to the table.  Place a small
piece of Alka-Seltzer (so small it is unrecognizable) and carefully place it 
on the hole where the now invisible tubing ends.  "Now watch carefully 
while I place a drop of water on it..and don't tell anybody about this!"
Put a drop of water on the Alka-Seltzer.  Once fizzing, have your accomplice
remove the pinch clamp so the water flows.  The victim will see the fizzing 
and slowly the water spot gets larger and larger, growing into a puddle and 
then starts to run off of the table and on to the floor, creating the illusion 
of water coming out of the sample of freeze-dried water.  

I don't know which got larger first...the water puddle or the victim's eyes.

It was classic....

Bob (who once made a label "Physics Honors Midterm Exam with answers", 
slapped it on an 8" floppy and left it in his classroom..heh heh!)