[geeks] quiet

[David Cantrell]

On Wed, Jun 05, 2002 at 08:49:27PM -0500, Amy wrote:

> 1. I'm getting tired of computers. I wasn't raised with them like most of
> you guys were..they weren't allowed. My mom considered computers and
> nintendo and the like to be bad--not to mention they were too expensive at
> the time. Until 1996 or so I had a viable life away from a monitor. I
> went out, I saw people, I interacted with folks on a much more human level
> than ASCII. I didn't sit in front of a monitor for 18 hours a day. Instead
> I went out, explored, and did so happy-go-luckily. Now it seems wherever I
> turn there's something electronic thats leashing me to here or there, be
> it the friends I have online who won't let me go eat dinner without
> guilting me later or cellphones and pagers interrupting the quiet times at
> home.

If people are laying on the guilt just because you're not available to them
all day every day, then I would suggest that they are the ones with a
problem, not you.  When I go out, I just disappear from IRC, my mail goes
unchecked, my phone gets turned off - and no-one minds.  If they had
something important to say, they'll have left a message and I'll call them
back when I get round to it.  No-one minds, because they're used to me
being like that.  So, I guess you just need to educate them.  And the best
way would seem to me to be to just do it.  If any of 'em give you a hard
time over it, then you have to ask whether you really want to have anything
to do with people who won't let you be you.

So I say do what the hell you want and bollocks to the lot of 'em!

> 3. I've been trying to simplify things in my life..from thoughts to
> actions to material things. It's left me with a strange wish to just get
> in my car and disappear off the face of the planet for awhile. Obviously I
> can't do this--it's just not feasible.

Why isn't it?  There must be plenty of places you can go where there's
no-one else around, where you can just walk all day/fish/read a good book/
whatever.

> 4. In the past 60 days I've figured out that I've screwed away ten years,
> countless friends, family..all for the sake of a simple chemical
> imbalance.

Hardly simple, and certainly not your own fault.

>             Now I wonder how much damage did I do and how much is
> repairable, if any? It left me thinking this about my current friends, my
> husband, my family. How does one apologize for being a Jeykll and Hyde
> bitch for a decade?

That's a toughie.  If it were me, I'd just be completely open and honest
about what's been going on - and if that can't mend the damage then at
least you won't be any worse off.  And start with those who're most likely
to be forgiving, as that way you won't lose confidence.

> 5. I'm really tired of pickles and diet coke.

Try full-fat coke instead? :-)

-- 
David Cantrell | Member of the Brute Squad | http://www.cantrell.org.uk/david

      Blessed are the pessimists, for they test their backups
                                            -- anon